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Alan Curbishley - he's just realised he left the iron on! Geddit?!
"Believe me, we have exciting times ahead at West Ham.
As Colin Chaston prepares for his FanZone debut against Man City on Sunday, the Hammers fan writes about his hopes and fears for 2008/09.
It may not bode well that Upton Park boss Alan Curbishley is the bookmakers' favourite to be the first Premier League manager to get the boot this season.
But that's unlikely to happen in the eyes of Colin who, like many a West Ham fan, is praying for an injury-free campaign - and to finish above London rivals Tottenham again!
In pre-season against Villarreal we came away with a creditable 1-1 draw and could have won if a second half goal hadn't been disallowed by a linesman who spotted an offside but failed to spot anything else during the game.
Despite a spirited display against the runners up in La Liga, many of the West Ham fans sitting around me in the Bobby Moore stand were moaning about Alan Curbishley.
When I asked why, they said he was 'too defensive'. But against Wigan, when we were under the cosh in the second half, he resisted going defensive. He substituted Ashton with Sears, Faubert with Boa Morte and Parker with Mullins - all like for like substitutions. That's what the fans want.
I feel if we can keep a regular back four he'll be more able to do that and take us to the dizzy heights we couldn't reach last season.
I'm excited about West Ham's young talent. Kyel Reid has pace and talent and a football brain, which is more than Theo Walcott has. Zavon Hines has pace and an eye for goal, while Freddie Sears reminds me of a young Tony Cottee and James Tompkins will mature into a world-class centre half.
Believe me, we have exciting times ahead at West Ham and I mustn't forget Mark Noble, England's best player on Tuesday, against Slovenia.
We haven't made many summer signings but I think we've uncovered a gem in Valon Behrami, a Lazio favourite.
One pundit questioned why we bought him saying he had 'an indifferent European Championship with Switzerland'. But watch him play; he never gives up, he runs, tackles, passes and goes past players - and he has a heart the size of Julian Dicks.
My prediction is he'll finish runner up in Hammer of the Year behind Dean Ashton.
All pre-season, in the pub, office, internet and everywhere I've been, all I've heard and read from pundits, both professional and amateur, is how they expect Tottenham to challenge the big four.
OK, their squad looks pretty good on paper but games aren't won on paper and they have the smallest squad in the Premier League. That will cost them, that and their attitude - they believe they only have to turn up to win!
Once again Tottenham are destined to finish below the Hammers. But cheer up Tottenham fans, you can still finish sixth, that is if Villa, City, Everton, Portsmouth and Newcastle all slip up.
My prediction is Tottenham will finish eleventh, again!
Come on you Irons!
Kris Commons' stunning strike gave Derby County a 1-0 victory over Man United in a thrilling Carling Cup semi-final first leg.
Blackburn claim they are yet to receive any bids for Roque Santa Cruz, while Portsmouth are keen to sign Newcastle's Joey Barton.
Zenit St Petersburg have told Sky Sports News they are only talking to Arsenal about Andrei Arshavin.
Kris Commons has spoken of his delight after his goal gave Derby a win over Manchester United at Pride Park.
Derby County caretaker boss David Lowe praised his side's attitude after a deserved win over Man United.