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Dream on Playboy

One question from the grotto... now that would be something!

Last updated: 19th November 2009

Helen said on air that it would be great if I ever got to interview Hef, but I'm not being funny, if I ever get into the Mansion the last person I'm going to be looking out for is a wrinkly old geezer - no matter how cool he is!

Tubes
Quotes of the week

Is there a better place on earth than the Playboy Mansion?

That's the question I've been asking myself ever since the Brodmeister (aka Brody Jenner) told me I could go and visit Hugh Hefner and his bunnies with him!

If I'm honest with myself I know it was only a token invite, but it's still the closest I've ever got to sitting in the grotto so I'm going to run with it!

Brody's girlfriend is former Playboy Playmate of the Year Jayde Nicole, so he obviously has an open invitation, and if I thought he was even remotely serious about it I'd be over there in a shot!

Helen said on air that it would be great if I ever got to interview Hef, but I'm not being funny, if I ever get into the Mansion the last person I'm going to be looking out for is a wrinkly old geezer - no matter how cool he is!

Champion

Anyway, before I need to take a cold shower I'll move on. It was a great weekend of sport for me. First I watched David Haye batter Nikolai Valuev to become world champion and I couldn't be happier for him.

I didn't think it was the most entertaining fight in the world, but he did exactly what he needed to do. I'm by no means an expert when it comes to boxing, but it seems obvious to me that he would have struggled if he just stood there and traded blows with a guy who's seven stone heavier than him.

The second part of my sporting weekend took place at Stamford Bridge. Like the Haye fight Chelsea's 1-0 win against Man Utd wasn't exactly a classic, but again we did what we had to do and got the job done.

It was great to see JT get his first goal of the season too, even if Anelka was trying to nick it off him!

Strong

It's obviously still relatively early in the season, but we've definitely put ourselves in a strong position, especially now that we're allowed to buy players in January again.

I have to admit I was worried about how we would cope without Drogba, Essien, Mikel and Kalou when they all go off to the African Nations in January, but being able to bring in a couple of replacements is massive.

I don't think we'll go out and spend £120 million like some people have been suggesting, but I'd love to see Atletico Madrid's Sergio Aguero at the Bridge. That boy is class!

Talking of quality strikers and we've got one of them on the sofa this week, Dean Windass!

He might be retired now but I still reckon he could do a job somewhere. We'll find out on Saturday anyway when he takes on Baby Elvis in the car park!

Later,

Tubes

Tubes answers your questions

Tubes! Can you teach me how to grow a hairy chest like you!?Darren Brooks (Manchester City fan).

Tubes replies: Straight off the bat I think I need to warn you Darren that a chest as hairy as mine sometimes comes at a cost... an equally hairy back! But if that doesn't faze you then I'm sure there are some remedies out there that can help, but you'll have to find them yourself!

Tubes! Tubesss! If there was one place in the world you could go to do your one question, where would it be and who would you interview?Michael Pearce (Sheffield United fan).

Tubes replies: Great question Michael and I think I've sort of answered it in the diary above. Definitely the Playboy Mansion and some Bunnies in the grotto!

Have you got one question and one question only for Tubes!? Ask the lyrical genius anything you want in the comments section below and he'll answer the best ones next week!