I nearly killed someone on the course. Trev was convinced that I had killed the bloke, but luckily I missed him. It probably would have been a better story if I had killed him...

Dave
Quotes of the week

It was Max's 30th on Saturday and so in true Soccer AM style the crew were out to help him celebrate this major landmark.

Everyone was pretty merry, although there were some members of the office who were a little merrier than the rest of us!

Simon was the life and soul of the party, to prove to us once and for all that he isn't as old as we all think.

Apparently he can't remember much of the night, but luckily the rest of us can and have been reminding him of exactly what he was getting up to.

On a completely unrelated note, this is probably as good a time as ever to make the following point - It's never cool to hit on a work colleague's sister!

Despite all the allegations, Simon has been in pretty good spirits this week and we're certain that it is down to the fact that the new Star Trek film premiered on Monday.

The only 'Trekkie' in the office has done his best this season to convince us that it is a show worth watching.

We were starting to come around to the idea, until he completely ruined his street cred by revealing that as a kid he was part of the Doctor Who Appreciation Society!

Chivalry

Meanwhile, Rocket proved this week that chivalry is well and truly dead, after admitting he didn't lift a finger to help his new flat mate move everything out of her room in preparation for a new carpet being fitted.

"She had to move a wardrobe, bed, desk... the lot!" he laughed, before adding: "She did well to be fair to her."

Elsewhere, it's been a painful couple of days for both Steve and Chris, albeit for very different reasons.

Steve broke his fingers while playing football on Saturday, but still managed to score a hat-trick for his side in a 3-2 win!

Fillings

While Chris was in a world of pain when he visited the dentist for the first of three fillings he has been told he will need. Ironically the problem wasn't the drilling into his tooth, it was the injection used to make sure he didn't feel the drilling.

"It really hurt, so I asked the nurse if she could give me anything to ease the pain," he explained. "She told me there was a cream I could rub on my gum, but that only kids normally need it... I took it anyway!"

Quality time

And finally Dave and Trev might not be living together anymore, but they've made an effort to spend some quality time together.

On Monday they headed to the golf course for a relaxing 18 rounds, but it turned out to be anything but relaxing:

"I nearly killed someone on the course," Dave casually explained. "Trev was convinced that I had killed the bloke, but luckily I missed him. It probably would have been a better story if I had killed him..."

And on that note... We'll see you next week!