I didn't do anything this weekend because my car's broken and I think I've got swine flu. This is why I hate public transport, you always catch something.

Steve
Quotes of the week

After two days of letting loose the office is never a picture of health on a Tuesday morning.

But this week is worse than usual. Steve in particular has been feeling under the weather and he reckons he might be the first crew member to have contracted swine flu!

As the rest of us grabbed for our surgical masks, he explained he had been suffering from flu like symptoms all weekend and blamed public transport for his present condition.

"I didn't do anything this weekend because my car's broken and I think I've got swine flu," he said. "This is why I hate public transport, you always catch something."

"I hate it too," added Lisa. "It's full of smelly people!"

Joke

Trev has had bigger things to worry about after ruining a friend's chances of getting a job by adding a few choice words to his CV as a joke, and then forgetting to tell him!

"I was on his laptop a couple of weeks ago and thought it would be funny if I changed a few of his interests," he explained to us.

"So I put down some pretty inappropriate things including the words 'I 'm a massive ...'. I was going to tell him the next day but completely forgot, and then he told me at the weekend that he had sent out loads of CV's but hadn't heard anything back!

"I came clean and he saw the funny side of it at first, but then it dawned on him what it meant and he got more and more angry as the night went on." The words payback spring to mind!

Cinema

Meanwhile, Bobbie revealed that his cinema club is in full swing after he and his mates went to watch Crank 2.

Apparently the club meets every Sunday and is becoming increasingly popular, which led Dave to ask: "What's the first rule of cinema club then?"

"It should be no DVD's," said Simon. Well with Bobbie in charge the first rule definitely isn't going to be 'you don't talk about cinema club'!

Dentist

In other news, Chris has been moaning about the rough treatment he got from the dentist after he went in for his second of three fillings. Apparently she didn't leave the cream on gum for long enough this time to take the pain away.

Lisa was less than sympathetic though: "Chris you really are a baby aren't you!"

Dave, meanwhile, has his own problems after a leaky pen not only ruined his jeans, but also the white sofa in his flat!

"I probably won't get my deposit back now so I've decided I'm just going to wreck the flat instead," he said. "I might take the partition walls down!"

Note to landlord, he was only joking... we think.

See you on Saturday!