Ratings Review

Johnson: Proud owner of a wooden spoon

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A Merseyside derby, a shock at the Emirates, red cards and highly contentious penalty decisions - there was plenty to get the pulses racing this weekend.

With that in mind, two-goal heroes, buccaneering full-backs, Asian promise and another debacle for Tottenham all feature in skysports.com's weekly round up of ratings winners and losers.

While a system which can be heavily tainted by bias is perhaps not the most fool-proof method of judging performance, the cream will invariably rise to the top and the feeble sink without trace.

This proves to be a case in point this weekend as those who basked in the glaze of an Indian summer scaled the heights and are awarded gold stars all round, while those who were blinded by a rare burst of sunlight must stay behind after class and explain their unacceptable behaviour.

It hardly needs me to tell you that a certain Spanish striker falls into the first of those categories after a decent day's work at Goodison, or that a moment of South American magic from Geovanni is unlikely to see him have to put his hand in his pocket when he strolls into his local Humberside boozer this week.

There are, though, a few names which have crept onto our roll of honour which have a tendency to float under the radar and we will ensure that they are rightly rewarded for their industrious showings.

But, before that, we may as well get the glaringly obvious out of the way.

The aforementioned Fernando Torres thoroughly deserves the plaudits that have come his way following a brilliant brace against arch-rivals Everton ensured the red half of Liverpool have official bragging rights until the return fixture on 17th January.

The Kop idol had looked a shadow of his former self up until this weekend but, having seen off the old enemy, he is rightly basking in the kind of star ratings he regularly picked up last term - earning an eight from our reporter and an average of 8.9 from an excitable Reds support.

Powerhouse

He is not alone at the top of the pile, however, and must share his title with Wigan's Amr Zaki after the Egyptian powerhouse put in yet another jaw-dropping display against Manchester City.

The African ace has quickly achieved cult hero status at the JJB Stadium, with a match-winning penalty on Sunday helping him on his way to scores of nine and 8.9 respectively.

Another man who can hold his head high after his weekend exploits is Hull's Senhor Geovanni after the little Brazilian shot down the Gunners on Saturday.

His wonder-strike at Arsenal put the Tigers on their way to an historic come-from-behind victory which will live long in the memory and saw the Latin star accumulate ratings of nine and 8.5.

His team-mate at the KC Stadium Boaz Myhill also deserves a mention, and falls into the reluctant hero category, as his heroics in North London saw him bag eight and 8.3.

Manchester United's Park Ji-sung is another prime example of man who, perhaps, does not get the recognition he deserves, but the Korean ace certainly caught the eye of the Old Trafford faithful against Bolton on Saturday and pocketed an impressive average fans' rating of 8.5 as a result.

The Red Devils supporters were less enamoured with Cristiano Ronaldo, however, disagreeing with our star man score of eight to hand the Portuguese superstar a miserly 7.1.

I digress, though, as we still have a few more congratulatory exchanges to get through.

Jose Bosingwa has been quick to prove that Chelsea were right to part company with the ineffectual Khalid Boulahrouz over the summer as he looks unlikely to relinquish his grasp on the right-back spot at Stamford Bridge.

Respectable

A free-flowing display of attacking football from a man paid to keep things tight at the back helped the Blues secure a comfortable 2-0 win at Stoke and earn himself highly respectable ratings of eight and 8.7.

Our final nod of acknowledgment sees us doth our cap in the direction of West Ham's Matthew Etherington, who may have only scored an eight but put in an inspiring display in front of the watching England manager Fabio Capello. He could prove to be a better option to Stewart Downing on the left flank for the Three Lions and his credentials will have been noted by the national coach.

With more than enough praise having been handed out for one day, we move on to those who should hang their head in shame at the mediocrity of their shambolic performances over the past few days.

There are a few to get through, so I feel it is best to churn them out in order of disgrace and avoid going into too much detail as to why they plumbed the depths.

Anyone scoring an average rating which falls below four does not deserve to escape the indignity of their failings being highlighted for all to see and Afonso Alves (3.9), Dave Kitson (3.8), Bobby Zamora (3.6) and Phil Neville (3.5) all fall into that category.

Elsewhere, Tim Cahill's red card against Liverpool earned him a rather favourable 3.4, while Xisco and William Gallas were also awarded that score.

Tottenham's continued regression into the worst 'top four' contenders in history deserves a bracket of its own, with David Bentley (3.5), Jermaine Jenas (3.1) and Gilberto (2.8) showing how it should not be done.

Remarkably, though, Gilberto manages to escape taking this week's wooden spoon as Fulham's Andy Johnson is awarded that 'honour' on the back of a truly dreadful rating of 2.3 after his petulance saw him dismissed before the half-time whistle had blown in the Cottagers' home defeat to West Ham.

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