What people fail to see is that for every million children who play the game at youth level, maybe one will go on to play at a higher level, and that is in the UK where opportunities abound - less here in the States where soccer is just taking off. Parents need to understand that not every kid is the next Ronaldo and if it happens, it can only do so with their support and appreciation for the hard work and dedication it takes.
Posted 17:39 15th April 2008
Matty Elliott says...
I'm 15 and I think they should drop players' wages and use that money to save and put into better equipment and facillities for the academies, centre of excellences and grassroots football to develop better players.
Posted 17:32 15th April 2008
Mike Lindop says...
when i was 12 i left my local team to play for another side in the same leauge, when we had to play against them, my former manager told each player when i got the ball to try and break my legs! the parents also were shouting break his legs, cripple him , and other foul language, i was only 12,
Also at the age of 17 i took up being a ref but had to quit after i was attacked by a parent of a player i booked that was in the walsall jr youth leauge
Posted 16:31 15th April 2008
Joe Taylor says...
I play under 15 football and I think the parents should have a card because when I was playing for one of my old clubs the parents fom the oppositon team used to give the wingers abuse when they were playing on the parents' side and it used to really scare and knock the players confidence.
Posted 16:29 15th April 2008
Andy Davids says...
I gave up sunday league football 2 years ago because I could not handle the pressure. If you performed badly in a match the parents of your team mates would hassle the manager to sub me off. Kids nowadays get no praisal when they play well, they only get critisised if they do bad. One derby game we played, after 50 minutes it was 5-5 and the game had to be stopped because the parents of the opposing teams started fighting. Kids in football are just the boxing gloves for a fight between bitter rivals.
Posted 16:28 15th April 2008
Jason Logsdail says...
I used to work at Nottinghamshire FA and we introduced a scheme in the late 90s. Where we had the pitch roped off and there was a sign saying "cross this line and get a fine" . It stopped parents from trying to come on to the pitch. Regarding bad parents at football matches I could write a book just from experience and I have not refereed a match in 5 years.
The two that stick out the most is when I was in the middle of a match and a player got injured and fan from the opposite team refused to let the trainer on the pitch to see to the player. He grabbed hold of him and would not let him on the pitch. The player that was down I found out was a former member and had left that season.
And another one was when an old man was watching his grandson play, when his grandson got tackled and the other player took the ball near the sideline. The old man stuck his stick in between the players legs tripping him up. I had to take his stick off him and get a chair for him to sit on and stuck him back from the sideline.
I have seen managers fighting, fans fighting even one game where the opposite team set fire to the changing room after losing. To be honest I am glad I no longer do it.
Posted 16:01 15th April 2008
Sam Bowden says...
I used to play in under 13s football and I quit because the pressure was too high. One of the our players' parents sent an opposing player off for handball on the goal line. The game had to be stopped and the whole team refused to shake our hands at the end. The parents abused the ref and stopped him from going in to the changing rooms. The parents are acting like the kids and the kids are acting like the parents.
Posted 15:43 15th April 2008
Sam Holden says...
I still play for my team, but I remember in a match last season there was a parent on the oposing side's team who openly criticised not only the referee, but also their sons team and manager.
whenever their son recieved the ball they would hurl commands at him, often the opposite of what the manager would say, and if he were tackled or didn't do as he was told then a barage of insults would follow, and some of the language used was an absolute disgrace, certianly for an adult to be using at a child of 14.
the parents also heavily critised the referee, and on several occasions openly criticised the manager who refused to respond to the outlandish comments.
when the game had finsihed (their team lost 4-0) the parent refused to look at their child and again confronted the referee with an onslaught of abuse, the members of our team had never seen anything quite like it. parents like this need to be sorted out, they need reminding that sunday league football is purely about enjoyment and these people suck the fun out of football
Posted 15:39 15th April 2008
Paul Tomkins says...
I've played in Sunday League for a number of years now and feel the referee's are as much to blame as the parents. Bad decisions from them are nearly always the trigger for parents to start shouting and argueing. I feel the competition is too high in Sunday league.At academy's the aim is to develop players and only the coaches can speak to the players but in sunday league all the managers and parents want is a win for their team at all costs and are able to voice their feelings. I have played in games were the kids have all been keen to get on with the game while referee's coaches and parents are argueing.
It needs sorting!
Posted 14:50 15th April 2008
Will Bowen says...
- I am a coach / Manager and club secretary
The way I see things are as follows -
The leagues must take some responsibilty for example they could help by only accepting charter standerd clubs in the league. They could also come along to some matches and do spot checks.
The main issue with grass roots is that everyone is giving there time free of charge and sometimes there are bad managers or coaches who dont have the best interest of the children at heart.
At our cub each manager is responsible for the parents and I have personally suspended parents in the past and will continue to do so if they step out of line.
I feel that some of the new intiatives that the FA are introducing are good but there are others are nothing more than money making ideas -
I believe that we should remove all academies for children under the age of 13 - then we would get rid of some of the parent pressure on children - it is a well known fact that scouts will only come and watch the better teams which then in turn coaches and managers then put extreme pressure of the players.
I also run school football teams and although I have witnessed several health and safety issues I have never witnessed foul and abusive parents coaches or managers (this is because the schools will deal with this).
I also believe that clubs should become more responsible and ensure that their managers and coaches are the correct people to work with children - all because some one has a level 1 coaching badge and a clean crb doesnt make him a decent person.
There is also a misconception that ex players make good coaches - I have the opposite view - its a good man manager that makes a good coach (we can train for the skill of football) but its hard to train a person to become a man manager.
I also beleive that the latest crop of referees (being one myself) are not the best and in it self does create issues - and some are abusive.
Posted 14:10 15th April 2008
John Smith says...
When I played at the under 16 level, in one game we played, the coach of the opposing team was also the ref about 60 mins into the match we were leading 2-1 and their team were gettin frustrated, one of our players made a poor challenge and the ref got very aggressive, our captain stepped in to try and calm the situation but this lead to the ref starting a fight with our captain, he head butted him b4 the team broke the fight up. The game was abandoned.
Posted 13:44 15th April 2008
Mark Skellorn says...
I have been coaching junior football on and off for around fourteen years and over that time there has not been much of a change in standards of touchline or pitch behaviour. What I have seen over this time is continual 'knee jerk' reactions by the the FA and local governing bodies. As this is a long standing problem the way I would suggest to try and overcome it would be to carry out real in depth independent research, free of political influences, into the scale of the problem. This would include gathering of all available data from leagues around the country (pro to grass roots), questionnaire and interviews with all sections of the game (referees, footballers, club officials etc) and use the information to, once and for all, understand and find the root causes of this issue. Only once that has been done can appropriate resonses be put in place to address the real problem. This would be a massive piece of work and fairly costly but if you were to take into account the spending that has taken place on knee jerk reactions would be worthwhile investment. As for the time element, nothing has worked previously and so to spend a year properly understanding the issue would also be worthwhile.
Posted 13:29 15th April 2008
Mark Pearce says...
The problem with youth football is the managers/coaches believe that they are mini fergies & wengers. They put winning meaningless trophies in front of kids playing and enjoying football. With roll on roll off subs there should be no excuse for kids standing on the touchline only coming on when their team is 4 nil up or 4 nil down.
Posted 13:24 15th April 2008
Derek Morrison says...
Hi
I remember playing in boys football some time ago now for Kirrie boys club and we were playing Christian Dailly's team, Sporting club where not many teams could go and get a result. We got stuffed, as expected, but every time a goal was scored, whether it was my fault or not, one of the boys parents had it in for me and kept shouting and saying how useless i was. I remember this game mostly because all the abuse from her was directed at me but on numerous other occassions the referee had sent her from the sidelines which in Scotland,although it maybe doesn't happen enough, does happen. Referees should have the authority to send off idiot parents giving no encouragement, only abuse. The boy who's parent it was was very embarrassed also. So not only did i feel bad but her son felt terrible aswell. If parents feel the need to voice their opinion it should be done in a constructive manner, encouraging the young lads to do better.
Posted 13:06 15th April 2008
James Faddes says...
My son plays at under 13 in Scotland and has played since he was 5 years old......the state of youth football north of the border is not much better. It's not just the parents who give abuse from the sidelines, some of the coaches involved in the game are not fit to run a subbuteo team never mind young children, I know of some teams who have three and four coaches who constantly shout abuse at opposing teams and officials, in one game a coach threatened the parents of the opposing team.
Posted 12:12 15th April 2008
Dan Whitehead says...
It's about time something was done but why has it been initiated after our 'i'm a celebrity' national team failed to make the biggest competition in the world. The problem has been growing for years and organisations like Give us back Our Game and Don't X the line have been doing what the FA are now attempting to introduce now for a long time with no backing whatsoever. There are Dad's and coaches like Paul and Mal around the country that have to be a key part of how this country reinvents it's grass roots game. No leagues for under 12's, small sided games and children reffing their own games is the way forward, our kids need to start enjoying the game, when they enjoy the game they develop more. The adultification of children's football is strangling football at all levels and unfortunately the blame is lying at the feet of our children. They want to play football but violent adults and wannabee coaches are causing children to give up the game. The blame needs to also lie with highly paid players who openly abuse officials on televised and live matches watched adoringly by kids around the country week in week out.
Posted 11:55 15th April 2008
Daniel Kelly says...
i play for burton albion u13s and we have no problem in our league of abusive parents because our league states that the parents have to stand beind a rope 5 yards from the pitch, the managers are more of a problem
Posted 11:51 15th April 2008
Ian Francis says...
nothing will improve until the top players learn to show respect for officials . they are the childrens heros and they set the trends . learn from rugby union and have a 10 minute sin bin for dissent or inappropriate behaviour .Also only let captains talk to referee . This will eventually create a culture where referees are respected and admired .
Posted 11:49 15th April 2008
Joe Macheyo says...
As the saying goes there's no friendly football game you have to let the young kids play but on their own terms. The kind of pressure adults bring is not always welcome. Football is a game that is played for enjoyment but the kids also want to win, so you have to strike a balance where parents should encourage their children to enjoy playing football and let the coaches introduce the relevant competitiveness gradually.
Posted 11:42 15th April 2008
John Frost says...
i manage a u14's team. we played a semi final for which there were no officals appointed and the opposing manager refereed the game. after many wild tackles and constant swearing from his players in the first half he was asked to get a grip of the game at half time. in the second half with the ball out of play, behind the refs back his own son head butted one of my players in the face in what can only be called an assult. the ref refused to even speak to his son, i withdrew my team from the game. i know this was extreme but when you pick boys up to play football their parents expect them to be returned home fit and healthy baring accidents. for takin my team out of the game i was fined £100 and lost my £33 deposit for asking for a personal hearing by west riding f.a.
Comments (108)
Fernando Moreno says...
What people fail to see is that for every million children who play the game at youth level, maybe one will go on to play at a higher level, and that is in the UK where opportunities abound - less here in the States where soccer is just taking off. Parents need to understand that not every kid is the next Ronaldo and if it happens, it can only do so with their support and appreciation for the hard work and dedication it takes.
Posted 17:39 15th April 2008
Matty Elliott says...
I'm 15 and I think they should drop players' wages and use that money to save and put into better equipment and facillities for the academies, centre of excellences and grassroots football to develop better players.
Posted 17:32 15th April 2008
Mike Lindop says...
when i was 12 i left my local team to play for another side in the same leauge, when we had to play against them, my former manager told each player when i got the ball to try and break my legs! the parents also were shouting break his legs, cripple him , and other foul language, i was only 12, Also at the age of 17 i took up being a ref but had to quit after i was attacked by a parent of a player i booked that was in the walsall jr youth leauge
Posted 16:31 15th April 2008
Joe Taylor says...
I play under 15 football and I think the parents should have a card because when I was playing for one of my old clubs the parents fom the oppositon team used to give the wingers abuse when they were playing on the parents' side and it used to really scare and knock the players confidence.
Posted 16:29 15th April 2008
Andy Davids says...
I gave up sunday league football 2 years ago because I could not handle the pressure. If you performed badly in a match the parents of your team mates would hassle the manager to sub me off. Kids nowadays get no praisal when they play well, they only get critisised if they do bad. One derby game we played, after 50 minutes it was 5-5 and the game had to be stopped because the parents of the opposing teams started fighting. Kids in football are just the boxing gloves for a fight between bitter rivals.
Posted 16:28 15th April 2008
Jason Logsdail says...
I used to work at Nottinghamshire FA and we introduced a scheme in the late 90s. Where we had the pitch roped off and there was a sign saying "cross this line and get a fine" . It stopped parents from trying to come on to the pitch. Regarding bad parents at football matches I could write a book just from experience and I have not refereed a match in 5 years. The two that stick out the most is when I was in the middle of a match and a player got injured and fan from the opposite team refused to let the trainer on the pitch to see to the player. He grabbed hold of him and would not let him on the pitch. The player that was down I found out was a former member and had left that season. And another one was when an old man was watching his grandson play, when his grandson got tackled and the other player took the ball near the sideline. The old man stuck his stick in between the players legs tripping him up. I had to take his stick off him and get a chair for him to sit on and stuck him back from the sideline. I have seen managers fighting, fans fighting even one game where the opposite team set fire to the changing room after losing. To be honest I am glad I no longer do it.
Posted 16:01 15th April 2008
Sam Bowden says...
I used to play in under 13s football and I quit because the pressure was too high. One of the our players' parents sent an opposing player off for handball on the goal line. The game had to be stopped and the whole team refused to shake our hands at the end. The parents abused the ref and stopped him from going in to the changing rooms. The parents are acting like the kids and the kids are acting like the parents.
Posted 15:43 15th April 2008
Sam Holden says...
I still play for my team, but I remember in a match last season there was a parent on the oposing side's team who openly criticised not only the referee, but also their sons team and manager. whenever their son recieved the ball they would hurl commands at him, often the opposite of what the manager would say, and if he were tackled or didn't do as he was told then a barage of insults would follow, and some of the language used was an absolute disgrace, certianly for an adult to be using at a child of 14. the parents also heavily critised the referee, and on several occasions openly criticised the manager who refused to respond to the outlandish comments. when the game had finsihed (their team lost 4-0) the parent refused to look at their child and again confronted the referee with an onslaught of abuse, the members of our team had never seen anything quite like it. parents like this need to be sorted out, they need reminding that sunday league football is purely about enjoyment and these people suck the fun out of football
Posted 15:39 15th April 2008
Paul Tomkins says...
I've played in Sunday League for a number of years now and feel the referee's are as much to blame as the parents. Bad decisions from them are nearly always the trigger for parents to start shouting and argueing. I feel the competition is too high in Sunday league.At academy's the aim is to develop players and only the coaches can speak to the players but in sunday league all the managers and parents want is a win for their team at all costs and are able to voice their feelings. I have played in games were the kids have all been keen to get on with the game while referee's coaches and parents are argueing. It needs sorting!
Posted 14:50 15th April 2008
Will Bowen says...
- I am a coach / Manager and club secretary The way I see things are as follows - The leagues must take some responsibilty for example they could help by only accepting charter standerd clubs in the league. They could also come along to some matches and do spot checks. The main issue with grass roots is that everyone is giving there time free of charge and sometimes there are bad managers or coaches who dont have the best interest of the children at heart. At our cub each manager is responsible for the parents and I have personally suspended parents in the past and will continue to do so if they step out of line. I feel that some of the new intiatives that the FA are introducing are good but there are others are nothing more than money making ideas - I believe that we should remove all academies for children under the age of 13 - then we would get rid of some of the parent pressure on children - it is a well known fact that scouts will only come and watch the better teams which then in turn coaches and managers then put extreme pressure of the players. I also run school football teams and although I have witnessed several health and safety issues I have never witnessed foul and abusive parents coaches or managers (this is because the schools will deal with this). I also believe that clubs should become more responsible and ensure that their managers and coaches are the correct people to work with children - all because some one has a level 1 coaching badge and a clean crb doesnt make him a decent person. There is also a misconception that ex players make good coaches - I have the opposite view - its a good man manager that makes a good coach (we can train for the skill of football) but its hard to train a person to become a man manager. I also beleive that the latest crop of referees (being one myself) are not the best and in it self does create issues - and some are abusive.
Posted 14:10 15th April 2008
John Smith says...
When I played at the under 16 level, in one game we played, the coach of the opposing team was also the ref about 60 mins into the match we were leading 2-1 and their team were gettin frustrated, one of our players made a poor challenge and the ref got very aggressive, our captain stepped in to try and calm the situation but this lead to the ref starting a fight with our captain, he head butted him b4 the team broke the fight up. The game was abandoned.
Posted 13:44 15th April 2008
Mark Skellorn says...
I have been coaching junior football on and off for around fourteen years and over that time there has not been much of a change in standards of touchline or pitch behaviour. What I have seen over this time is continual 'knee jerk' reactions by the the FA and local governing bodies. As this is a long standing problem the way I would suggest to try and overcome it would be to carry out real in depth independent research, free of political influences, into the scale of the problem. This would include gathering of all available data from leagues around the country (pro to grass roots), questionnaire and interviews with all sections of the game (referees, footballers, club officials etc) and use the information to, once and for all, understand and find the root causes of this issue. Only once that has been done can appropriate resonses be put in place to address the real problem. This would be a massive piece of work and fairly costly but if you were to take into account the spending that has taken place on knee jerk reactions would be worthwhile investment. As for the time element, nothing has worked previously and so to spend a year properly understanding the issue would also be worthwhile.
Posted 13:29 15th April 2008
Mark Pearce says...
The problem with youth football is the managers/coaches believe that they are mini fergies & wengers. They put winning meaningless trophies in front of kids playing and enjoying football. With roll on roll off subs there should be no excuse for kids standing on the touchline only coming on when their team is 4 nil up or 4 nil down.
Posted 13:24 15th April 2008
Derek Morrison says...
Hi I remember playing in boys football some time ago now for Kirrie boys club and we were playing Christian Dailly's team, Sporting club where not many teams could go and get a result. We got stuffed, as expected, but every time a goal was scored, whether it was my fault or not, one of the boys parents had it in for me and kept shouting and saying how useless i was. I remember this game mostly because all the abuse from her was directed at me but on numerous other occassions the referee had sent her from the sidelines which in Scotland,although it maybe doesn't happen enough, does happen. Referees should have the authority to send off idiot parents giving no encouragement, only abuse. The boy who's parent it was was very embarrassed also. So not only did i feel bad but her son felt terrible aswell. If parents feel the need to voice their opinion it should be done in a constructive manner, encouraging the young lads to do better.
Posted 13:06 15th April 2008
James Faddes says...
My son plays at under 13 in Scotland and has played since he was 5 years old......the state of youth football north of the border is not much better. It's not just the parents who give abuse from the sidelines, some of the coaches involved in the game are not fit to run a subbuteo team never mind young children, I know of some teams who have three and four coaches who constantly shout abuse at opposing teams and officials, in one game a coach threatened the parents of the opposing team.
Posted 12:12 15th April 2008
Dan Whitehead says...
It's about time something was done but why has it been initiated after our 'i'm a celebrity' national team failed to make the biggest competition in the world. The problem has been growing for years and organisations like Give us back Our Game and Don't X the line have been doing what the FA are now attempting to introduce now for a long time with no backing whatsoever. There are Dad's and coaches like Paul and Mal around the country that have to be a key part of how this country reinvents it's grass roots game. No leagues for under 12's, small sided games and children reffing their own games is the way forward, our kids need to start enjoying the game, when they enjoy the game they develop more. The adultification of children's football is strangling football at all levels and unfortunately the blame is lying at the feet of our children. They want to play football but violent adults and wannabee coaches are causing children to give up the game. The blame needs to also lie with highly paid players who openly abuse officials on televised and live matches watched adoringly by kids around the country week in week out.
Posted 11:55 15th April 2008
Daniel Kelly says...
i play for burton albion u13s and we have no problem in our league of abusive parents because our league states that the parents have to stand beind a rope 5 yards from the pitch, the managers are more of a problem
Posted 11:51 15th April 2008
Ian Francis says...
nothing will improve until the top players learn to show respect for officials . they are the childrens heros and they set the trends . learn from rugby union and have a 10 minute sin bin for dissent or inappropriate behaviour .Also only let captains talk to referee . This will eventually create a culture where referees are respected and admired .
Posted 11:49 15th April 2008
Joe Macheyo says...
As the saying goes there's no friendly football game you have to let the young kids play but on their own terms. The kind of pressure adults bring is not always welcome. Football is a game that is played for enjoyment but the kids also want to win, so you have to strike a balance where parents should encourage their children to enjoy playing football and let the coaches introduce the relevant competitiveness gradually.
Posted 11:42 15th April 2008
John Frost says...
i manage a u14's team. we played a semi final for which there were no officals appointed and the opposing manager refereed the game. after many wild tackles and constant swearing from his players in the first half he was asked to get a grip of the game at half time. in the second half with the ball out of play, behind the refs back his own son head butted one of my players in the face in what can only be called an assult. the ref refused to even speak to his son, i withdrew my team from the game. i know this was extreme but when you pick boys up to play football their parents expect them to be returned home fit and healthy baring accidents. for takin my team out of the game i was fined £100 and lost my £33 deposit for asking for a personal hearing by west riding f.a.
Posted 11:11 15th April 2008