We talk to author Tom Cox about his critically acclaimed golf book 'Bring Me The Head Of Sergio Garcia'.
Dave Tindall talks to author Tom Cox about his critically acclaimed golf book 'Bring Me The Head Of Sergio Garcia'
Each Christmas, when I open the presents sent from my well-meaning parents, my heart sinks when I rip the wrapping off the package containing a book called "world's favourite golf jokes".
The problem is I don't find these at all funny. Just looking at the cartoon drawing of an old-fashioned golfer on the cover wipes any sort of festive smile off my face and the book is usually slid out of view under a selection box which, despite being in my 40s, my parents also still send me (no complaints there).
But golf books can be funny though. Very funny in fact.
And when a former Ryder Cup skipper describes one as full of "razor sharp insights and buckets of humour", adding "I can't recommend it highly enough", it's worth taking notice.
The book in question is Bring Me The Head Of Sergio Garcia by Tom Cox and the gushing review comes from 1997 European captain Mark James.
It brilliantly and very humourously tells the tale of how Cox rekindles his teenage dream of turning pro and tries to win a spot in The Open Championship.
Without giving too much away, let's just say we shouldn't expect to see him contesting the Claret Jug at Muirfield this year.
Books of golf jokes may serve a purpose as stocking fillers but if you're looking for something with a bit more intelligence, wit and imagination that gets to the true heart of this often absurd game, Bring Me The Head Of Sergio Garcia is an excellent alternative.
Interview with author Tom Cox
Sky Sports: When the book was conceived and released, Sergio Garcia was one of the world's best and thus it made sense to aim for his scalp. Were there times during his slump in 2009/10 when you wished you'd called it something else? Not everyone will be aware that it's a play on Sam Peckinpah's 1974 surreal movie 'Bring Me the Head of Alfredo Garcia' so were you concerned that people might look at the title of the book and think you were a madman who actually wanted to kill him? :)
Tom Cox: To be honest, I've never wished I'd called it something else because it was one of those titles that arrived in perfect unison with the idea for the book, and I never doubted for a second that it was right (having written six and a half books, and scrapped various others, I know that's a rare and lovely confluence). Obviously I wish he'd won a major in 2007 or 2008 and the book had received stratospheric sales as a result, got an American deal and been made into a ridiculously overblown Hollywood film, but I was aware of the risks: Sergio was already a very mercurial and unreliable player by 2005, when I came up with the title. I think I actually have almost wanted to kill him at times, since he is arguably the most frustrating golfer in the world to watch. I think, by the standards of most of his fans, my rage at his repeated underachievements is quite mild. I have friends I've seen harm themselves and their furniture upon witnessing him mess up on the last day of a major.
Sky Sports: After being obsessed by golf as a teenager, how on earth did you stay away from it for eight years?
TC: The simple answer is that I realised that some things are more important than golf. And by "some things" I mean "one thing". And by "one thing" I mean "having a sex life".
Sky Sports: Having your first hole-in-one played a part in getting you back into golf. Do you think it's the fate of all golfers to be lured in by these so called 'signs'?
TC: The secret to good golf is such a mysterious and elusive thing, it makes us golfers a superstitious bunch, who will cling desperately to anything positive, in terms of a pattern or a sign. So many serious golfers are a bit cynical about hole in ones: they're viewed as flukes, and something people who don't know much about golf think erroneously is the most exciting part of the game. But when you actually have one, after waiting for it for the better part of two decades, that all goes out the window. I don't think my hole in one was what really convinced me I could give being a pro a go - I think consistently outdriving the Captain of the Norfolk scratch team by 30 yards during one particularly good ball-striking round and winning my club's scratch cup with a three birdie in a row finish played more of a part - but watching my hole in one go in without bouncing on a lovely summer evening gave me a vivid picture of myself doing the same thing on Tour, as a large crowd behind me went wild and Bruce Critchley announced that that put me four ahead of Jim Furyk with just two holes to play: a picture that very soon proved to be entirely deluded.
Sky Sports: You quote the PG Wodehouse story, 'The Clicking of Cuthbert', where a disgruntled young player storms into the clubhouse and asks a wise old member 'Is golf any use?' Do you have an answer yet?
TC: I think golf's usefulness is easy to underrate and I probably do it all too often. Without golf, I probably would have got into a lot more trouble as a teenager. Golf made me more adept at dealing with people from a different social class to me, more respectful of my elders, made me better at dealing with a crisis (which is a good job, as I'm not great at it, even with that extra training that comes from following a triple bogey with a cruelly lost ball when you'd previously been two under par) and probably made me a more polite person than I might have otherwise been in early adulthood. So in those ways it's been very useful. I could have lived without the twisted spine, though.
Do you think you're drawn to golf as it's easy to play the role of the outsider - a role you would appear to enjoy - when you're up against the pringle sweater-wearing Roys and Rons of this world?
TC: I certainly was, at one point - without really realising it. I wasn't particularly brave as a teenager so being in that kind of world made becoming a bit of a rebel very easy. These days my agenda for playing golf is more straightforward: I just want to hit the ball really sodding far.
Sky Sports: Is golf cool?
TC: Yes, but not in the ways people who have tried to *make* it cool think. Seve Ballesteros in his blue Slazenger jumper on the final day at Lytham in 1988 is cool. A middle-aged Fred Couples hitting a drive 300 plus yards with apparently no more effort than someone flipping a pancake is cool. Brian Barnes winning Pipe Smoker Of The Year in 1977 or beating Nicklaus twice in a day is cool. Turning up looking dishevelled and using ten year old clubs and still knocking it past guys with two grand's worth of gear is cool. Ant and Dec's celeb golf tournaments? Golf Punk's Bunker Babes? Some particularly lurid clothing and sticky pro hair that's been about in the last decade? Not so cool.
Sky Sports: In the book, you reveal how easy it was to turn pro. Is that still the case?
TC: I'm slightly out of the loop on this right now, having had a couple of years where I've played minimal golf, but I'm assuming so: as much as the Professional Golfers Association don't want an army of Maurice Flitcrofts on their courses, the lower tours need to make their tournaments accessible to the also-rans and dreamers whose meagre savings help finance them.
Sky Sports: How much do you reckon you spent during your brief spell as a pro? Did the amount alarm you or had you braced yourself for it?
