Lesbian Visibility Day: LGBT+ women in sport share advice on sexuality
A Lionesses legend and an Olympic gold medallist join five more inspirational women in sport to reveal what they've learned along the way about being LGBT+
Sunday 26 April 2020 20:03, UK
All this week, Sky Sports has been sharing stories to mark the first-ever Lesbian Visibility Week, a new awareness initiative celebrating women-loving women in the LGBT+ community.
We're proud to support Stonewall's Rainbow Laces campaign as members of TeamPride and as the week draws to a close with Lesbian Visibility Day itself, we invited sportswomen to pass on the kind of collective wisdom that would have been beneficial to them when they were younger.
The world of sport has long been able to point to many strong role models who happen to be lesbians, from English football pioneer Lily Parr to tennis legend Billie Jean King, and more recently, Olympic champion athlete Caster Semenya and two-time World Cup winner Megan Rapinoe.
Whatever level you compete or participate at, navigating the relationship between sexuality and sport can often be complicated. Rainbow Laces is helping clubs, governing bodies and individual athletes on their respective inclusion journeys by showing how to create welcoming cultures and achieve more through authenticity.
So what would have been worth knowing when these women were starting out in sport?
The Lioness who found her pride
Lianne Sanderson has 50 caps for England and won a bronze medal at the 2015 World Cup. Her career has taken her all over the world, playing in the United States, Italy, Cyprus and England, where she won the Champions League with Arsenal Women.
I was very different to most. I didn't grow up feeling like I was gay because I had a boyfriend and I loved him.
I enjoyed the journey to finding my sexuality. What feels right, feels right. I am very lucky to come from a family who, regardless of my preferences, love me and who I am with, either way.
My advice to my younger self would be: be exactly the same as you are now. I was the first openly gay footballer in England and one of the first in the world. When people ask me if that was hard, I answer no. It just feels right to use my platform to help others. If me being me does that, then I'm happy.
Allow yourself to grow, says golden girl
Hockey player Susannah Townsend is a European and Olympic champion and uses her voice to raise awareness of LGBT+ issues in sport.
If I was sitting having a coffee with my younger self, I would give her this advice: Feel what you feel, even if it's uncomfortable and confusing. We all feel and think things for a reason and this helps shape us into the people we are.
We are constantly evolving. Don't be afraid to be yourself and don't forget to love yourself first. Love every bit of you, as that's what makes you unique. Everyone who loves and cares for you just wants you to be happy, so find out what makes you happy from within.
'Truth will keep you on track'
Racing driver Charlie Martin has campaigned for transgender inclusion in sport for a number of years and hopes to become the first driver who is transgender to compete in the 24 hours of Le Mans race. She is also a Stonewall Sport Champion.
I'd explain to my younger self that being my true self is the key to unlocking my performance. Burying everything deep inside just causes more pain in the long run.
Things will be fine. In fact, things will be amazing. People will accept you for who you really are. You've worried about everything for so long in your head that you've lost perspective. The people that matter in your life love you for who you are, and they will love you just as much for being the real you, if not even more, because they know how brave you are.
A chase to gain confidence
Corinne Humphreys represented Team England at the 2018 Commonwealth Games and is a core member of the Athletics Pride Network, as well as being among Stonewall's first Sport Champions.
Baby C, life gets better. There is going to be a day when the type of people you're attracted to are going to like you back and make you feel wanted and special. The people that matter in your life will always love you and would want you to live your truth instead of feeling like you have to hide the real you.
Don't settle for an unhealthy relationship because you perceive your sexuality as restricting - there are tons of amazing women that will want to get to know you. Actively take the time to appreciate what makes you a special human being, regardless of your sexuality.
The racing driver who followed her heart
Sarah Moore is a W Series racing driver who has blazed a trail for women in motorsport since winning the Ginetta Junior Championship at the age of 15. She is a Driver Ambassador for Racing Pride, the LGBT+ inclusion in motorsport organisation, and like Sanderson, was recently named on the DIVA Visible Lesbian 100 list.
Be yourself and go with your heart - that's the best advice I'd give to anyone. You've just got to get yourself through the rough patch. It may be tough to start off with, but when you become true to yourself it will always be your real friends that stand by you. I found it all fairly easy because of my personality and the way I approach life in general, but I know others who struggled and I've even had conversations with people who were thrown out of the house by their parents when they found out.
Reach out to your friends for support - family is family, and 98 per cent of the time they'll come around. Speaking as an ambassador for Racing Pride, we're always there to help anyone or answer any questions that people may have and help them through those difficult situations that they may find themselves in.
'I became a voice for positive change'
Lou Englefield has been advocating for LGBT+ inclusion in sport for over a decade. She is the director of Pride Sports and has been instrumental in increasing the awareness of the Football v Homophobia campaign. She was also included on the DIVA Visible Lesbian 100 list.
I didn't come out until I was 20. I'd known I wasn't attracted to men before that, but had no lesbian role models and the only queer people I was aware of were treated with suspicion and derision.
On reflection, I didn't really understand who I was and the 1980s weren't the most embracing times for a voyage of LGBT+ self-discovery. I'd played sport all my life, but found the 'don't ask, don't tell' culture on women's teams suffocating and, to be honest, quite intimidating.
In the end, I found a space to be myself with a group of LGBT+ activists and allies in the small town where I went to polytechnic. It was there that my passion for justice and activism was welcomed, and where, of course, I got together with my first girlfriend. If I could say one thing to myself during that time, it would be: 'One day you will be accepted for your whole self, and your passion for LGBTIQ+ human rights will be valued.'
The cricketer who took control
Maxine Blythin was named Kent Women's Cricketer of the Year in 2019 as the team won the County Championship title last season.
My sexuality - like my gender - was something I always knew. It was just an innate part of who I was. The challenge for me came from being perceived as male in my early teens. I didn't face the initial social pressures of being a lesbian that others would have done, and it meant I was able to date without a second thought. But when I found a partner and knew I had to transition, our relationship and the way my sexuality was viewed would be flipped on its head.
The reactions of my partner (would she be into girls?), family, friends and strangers were all something I feared. I expected never-ending questions of - what does that mean? Why do you feel that way? The reality is, it is who I am. So instead of fear or trepidation, which was the overriding feeling at the time as I let who I was get me down, my advice to a younger self would be to own who you are. You don't need to fully explain it. Just be who you are and own it, rather than letting it own you. As you begin to become more comfortable with that concept, you will experience so much more joy in embracing your identity than you can ever imagine.
Stories edited by Jessica Creighton and Jon Holmes.
Lesbian Visibility Week concludes on Sunday.
Sky Sports is a member of TeamPride which supports Stonewall's Rainbow Laces campaign. If you'd like to inspire others in sport by sharing your own story of being LGBT+ or an ally, please contact us here.
