Avil's new chapter

Hollie Avil: Announced she has been suffering from depression

Today a promising young athlete quit just months before the London 2012 Games.

Hollie Avil was the world junior triathlon champion and aged 18 was ranked world number one.

Today she announced that she's been suffering from depression and an eating disorder and has decided to give up competing. She spoke to Sky's Olympics producer Lia Hervey...

Why did you decide to retire?
I decided it was time for a new chapter in my life after my years of highs and lows in triathlon. I had some fantastic times, but the bad times outweighed the good. I don't want to carry on the next few years being unhappy and risking my health.

What pushed you into making the decision?
I decided that I wanted to be healthy and happy. Being a triathlete was not making me happy and I was worried my health would come at risk again if I carried on.

It's so close to the Games - why now?
When I was diagnosed with my stress fractures, I knew it would be a struggle for me to get fit enough for the qualifying races for the Games. I created so much pressure on myself as I was desperate to get fit and it broke my heart to think I wouldn't be going to London. But I realised that not going to the Olympics was my path. I also realised not being a professional athlete anymore was also my path. I'd rather go to the Games to watch as a happy and healthy lady, then watch wishing I was there and knowing deep down I'm miserable.

How hard is life as an elite athlete?
Life as an elite athlete is really hard. You have to dedicate your life to the sport. It takes over your mind and it takes over your body. With the hard work you get great rewards but you also get dark times too. Sometimes these dark times out weigh the good times.

Eating disorder

Is there a lot of pressure on women to look good? We're in a world of sponsorship deals now. Does this put added pressure?
I have never felt any pressure from my sponsors to look good. Sponsors want to advertise athletes, not models (most of the time). I loved being part of the Stella McCartney for Adidas Team GB range. Stella used athletes to model her clothes, which is great.

How big a problem are eating disorders in elite sport?
It's a bigger problem than we all know. Not just in women but in males too. The topic becomes taboo though and no one wants to speak about it. We focus on injury prevention, but I also think sporting federations need to work more on eating disorder prevention too.

Why did you decide to speak out about something so private?
I've only felt like I can speak out now as I've ended my career. When I was still competing, I was scared at the stigma that may be attached to me. I didn't want to be looked at as 'the athlete with problems'. But now I am out of the sport, it is part of my past. I also want to speak out to help others.

How hard has your struggle been?
I can't put into words how dark some of my times have been. I never want to go back there and am so proud of myself for overcoming such a huge battle.

Can you tell me in what way your problem manifested itself?
Eating disorders are an addiction. You become addicted to not eating and getting thinner, you just keep going and going and nothing gets in your way. As I saw myself loosing weight, I just wanted to keep going and kept thinking of other ways I could restrict my diet.

How did you hide it?
I became a very sneaky person when I had my eating disorder. I would sneak around and lie a lot. I would say I was eating when I wasn't.

Do you have a message to other young athletes?
Health and happiness are the most important things in sport and it's not worth sacrificing those. I did, it was short term, and now I've stopped my sport. I will always be here to help young athletes and want to make myself accessible to those who want to speak to me. I want to help male and females in anyway I can.

What will you do now?
I guess the world is my oyster. I am off to Madrid this weekend to cheer on some of my friends and hopefully see them make the GB Triathlon team for London. I'm then off to Asia for a month. I'm going to a yoga retreat in Thailand with a friend, I can't wait. I'd still like to work in sport, I'm going to start coaching and perhaps some personal training. I'd also like to start up a charity to help athletes with eating disorders, this is something that may take time.