Tuesday 3 October 2017 19:29, UK
In the latest The Players' Tribune offering, Cristiano Ronaldo provides an emotional insight into the importance of his family and how being a father himself has changed his outlook.
When I started playing professionally at 17, my mother could barely watch because of the stress.
She would come to watch me play at the old Estadio José Alvalade, and she got so nervous during big games that she passed out a few times. Seriously, she passed out. The doctors started prescribing her sedatives just for my matches.
I would say to her, "Remember when you didn't care about football?" ;-)
I started dreaming bigger and bigger. I wanted to play for the national team, and I wanted to play for Manchester [United] because I watched the Premier League on TV all the time. I was mesmerized by how fast the game moved and the songs that the crowds would sing. The atmosphere was so moving to me.
When I became a player for Manchester, it was a very proud moment for me, but I think it was an even prouder moment for my family.
At first, winning trophies was very emotional for me. I remember when I won my first Champions League trophy at Manchester, it was an overwhelming feeling. Same thing with my first Ballon d'Or. But my dreams kept getting bigger. That's the point of dreams, right? I had always admired Madrid, and I wanted a new challenge. I wanted to win trophies at Madrid, and break all the records, and become a club legend.
Over the past eight years, I have achieved incredible things at Madrid. But to be honest, winning trophies later on in my career has become a different kind of emotion. Especially in these last two years. At Madrid, if you don't win everything, other people consider it a failure. This is the expectation of greatness. This is my job.
I started dreaming bigger and bigger. I wanted to play for the national team, and I wanted to play for Manchester, because I watched the Premier League on TV all the time.
But when you are a father, it is a completely different feeling. A feeling that I cannot describe. This is why my time in Madrid has been special. I have been a footballer, yes, but also a father.
There is a moment with my son that I will always remember so clearly.
When I think about it, I feel warm.
It was the moment on the field after we won the last Champions League final in Cardiff. We made history that night. When I was on the pitch after the final whistle, it felt like I had sent a message to the world. But then my son came on the field to celebrate with me … and it was like the snap of a finger. Suddenly, the entire emotion changed. He was running around with Marcelo's son.
We held the trophy together. Then we walked around the field, hand in hand.
It is a joy that I did not understand until I was a father. There are so many emotions happening simultaneously that you cannot describe the feeling in words. The only thing I can compare it to is how I felt when I was warming up in Madeira and I saw my mother and sister huddled together in the stands.
When we returned to the Bernabéu to celebrate, Cristiano Jr. and Marcelito were playing around on the field in front of all the fans. It was a much different scene than when I was playing in the streets at his age, but I hope that the feeling for my son is the same as it was for me. Menino querido da família.
After 400 matches with Madrid, winning is still my ultimate ambition. I think I was born like that. But the feeling after I win has definitely changed. This is a new chapter in my life. I had a special message engraved on my new Mercurial boots. It's right on the heel, and the words are the last thing that I read before I lace up my boots and go to the tunnel.
It is like a final reminder … a final motivation. It says, "El sueño del niño."
The dream of the child.
Maybe now you understand.
In the end, of course - my mission is the same as it has always been. I want to continue to break records at Madrid. I want to win the most titles possible. This is just my nature.
But what means the most to me about my time in Madrid, and what I will tell my grandchildren about when I am 95 years old, is the feeling of walking around the pitch as a champion, hand in hand with my son.
After 400 matches with Madrid, winning is still my ultimate ambition. I think I was born like that. But the feeling after I win has definitely changed. This is a new chapter in my life.
I hope we will do it again.
To read more from Ronaldo, check out the article in full on the Players Tribune website.
